Stephen Lynch

I like my toast buttered

And I'll take mine dry

I dig the Beatles

I'm a Stones kind of guy

I have fine taste and I like things cheap

I wanna stay up all night I just wanna sleep

With your sister

What did you just say?


You just said something-

I wanna sleep, alright here we go

No, I'm not ready

I love the sunshine

and I wanna nail your sister

No, see, your doing it again

I like Julia Robert's movies

I just wanna F the S out of your sister

And Mark you would rule

Hey, if ya just say it's cool

I'd go pick her up

At her junior high school

Yeah your sister, yeah

I wanna F your sister

I wanna F her in the A

And just C all over her chin

Well I'd stick my fist in her V

And I'd move it around and then I'd move it to her A fuck hole

It'd be so f-ing great

I'd nail her

Yeah I wanna nail your sister

Stop it!


I wanna make one thing clear

I do not like Julia Robert's movies!


Stephen Lynch is an American singer and comedian, famous for his raunchy comic lyrics. He was born July 28, 1971 in Abington, Pennsylvania, but grew up in Saginaw, Michigan and attended Western Michigan University, where he learned to play guitar. He is a Tony nominee for his role as Robbie Hart in the Broadway musical, The Wedding Singer. Stephen married Erin Dwight in September of 2003.

Lynch has produced eight albums:
Live At XM Studios (Live concert available only on the XM Comedy channel, no CD release planned) ... Read More